Skip to main content

Laura was a 30-year-old patient presenting dissociative symptoms stemming from severe physical and psychological abuse experienced during childhood, coupled with certain narcissistic traits such as a craving for power and a lack of empathy. She oscillated between different states, displaying sensitivity and sweetness in some sessions, while appearing inflexible and tyrannical in others. As she transitioned into hysterical and narcissistic states, she easily took offense at trivial matters, typically blaming others through a blend of defense mechanisms like denial, rationalization, and intellectualization. Fundamentally, Laura resisted accepting this hysterical aspect of herself and the reality of her abuse. Despite being a talented poet who enjoyed listening to music, Laura resisted (intellectualization) improvising during sessions or engaging in more active experiences. As she expressed, music provided her a sense of security with its inherent beauty and order, yet she remained unsure of her musical abilities. In response, I speculated that she might fear losing control over her hysterical patterns. One day, I proposed a musical gift—a technique called "giving" (Bruscia, 1987)—and she agreed with curiosity. I began improvising on the piano while singing one of her poems, playing with strength and passion. My improvisation seemed to convey that it was sometimes acceptable to play with intensity. From that moment, Laura started improvising with me, discussing her improvisations, and acknowledging her hysterical side without guilt. Gradually, she integrated the hysterical aspect of her personality, linked to the abuse, undermining the fragmentation of her being. Laura's hysterical pattern was intricately connected to the abuse she endured, serving as a defense mechanism to avoid integrating the associated emotions. Reflecting on her life patterns, she gained increased awareness, diluting her emotional claustrophobia—an underlying cause of her anxiety and life dissatisfaction. In therapy, Laura learned to surrender to the process, experiencing her emotions naturally rather than in a frustrating manner. She even became more prolific in her poetic work, understanding that if she doesn't express her emotions constructively, they could become detrimental to herself and her family.

English